Today I caught up on some much needed sleep; the previous two nights I was nervous about meeting up with the photographer and got maybe half the amount of sleep I am used to. After catching up on the sleep time is feeling really weird, like five days have gone by not just one! I am also excited about the photo shoot and it feels like it's taking forever so that's also messing with my head. I have no idea what to expect this is such new territory for me! I came up with more ideas for Glenn and then after having sent him about 10 emails in one day I began to feel like I was bombarding him. What a shift for him though, the artist he was working with before me was slower than a slug, taking five months to get half way done a single work of art! And it's mostly lines at that! Apparently he had some conflicts with the type of work he would be doing, but if that is the case I don't understand why he accepted to do it in the first place, unless he felt the need from a fearful place. Still, I want to give Glenn some breathing room and maybe just a small update each day.
But wow, things are very active right now, so many things happening all at once. I am to varying degrees working on 8 separate projects with another potentially on the way! Well to be fair most of the activity is in four of the eight, but I am enjoying myself the whole way. Heck I demand it! If I don't feel enthused about a project then I do not commit to it. There is a very strong energy I feel when something is right for me. It's like a strong but silent "YESSSS let's gooo!" Anything less and I either strait up reject it or give myself a chance to ponder.
See it's something we're shifting into, out of this idea that we have to do all these stupid things we don't want to. No Way! Responsibility can be fun if we feel it all out and trust ourselves. We must also be willing to be daring, or at least daring to our egos. It feels daring because it is different, and unknown and we all tend to have a fear of the unknown. But in fact it is normal, to someone who has been doing it all along. Yet it is a void as far as we are concerned and if we want to enjoy the fulness of what life can be for us we MUST be willing to step it up and step into the void!
All things creative.